Convincing Ourselves

  Trends move the world. It doesn't matter who we are, where we live, what social strata we belong to, or how educated we are, the world, and the society at large, moves in trends. Ideas, social norms, thoughts, products, people, books, political ideologies, and everything else, that everyone seems to be going towards, and sometimes like waves, die out as well.   Trends are real A woman in Los Angeles tries out a new restaurant because it's ‘fashionable’. The hype is so great that she herself ends up hyping it up. After all, it's considered ‘trendy’ to be seen here. Similarly, liberal human rights activists suddenly out of the blue, starts to tweet against what is happening in South Sudan because George Clooney started campaigning about what is doing in Darfur. It's on peoples minds and being a human rights activist A trader in New York buys up Amazon stock. There was a great news article probably published by Amazon’s PR but it has pushed higher and the trader's in...

  We know high performers, in the field of management, sports, art, academia and other crafts, have to go through a considerable level of daily stressors. In fact, it is often thought that stress and anxiety are inevitable when achieving high-quality results in a competitive environment, especially one where the margin of error is small or there are time constraints.   This is a common stream of thinking, in high-performance fields as well as everyday perception. We have all seen Gordon Ramsay screaming at his staff when things go wrong at a Michelin starred restaurant. We have seen Serena Williams erupt into a bullying frenzy when she lost. We all know of stern bosses who have no problem in confronting and resolving problems, even if requires a considerable amount of screaming.   But the question is, is that how one is supposed to feel in a high-performance situation? Is there a correct ‘feeling to feel’ in a high-performance situation?   Well, as is usually the cas...

We daily encounter situations which are uncomfortable. It can be talking to a boss, going into a meeting and for some even getting up to take a walk. Whatever the case, anxiety provoking events are common and everywhere. For severe cases of anxiety or panic, which may be due to some form of trauma or even a deeper mental health issue, I would recommend seeing a professional, however for everyday life, there are many techniques that one can use and one of them is 'nudging' We we need it: Many situations in life make us question ourselves i.e our self concept as well as our abilities. Going into a meeting a young graduate may think that they dont belong there or they cannot contribute enough. Similarly a new CEO may wonder if they have what it takes or even if they are meant to run a company. Such self doubt is common and is often accompanied by even questioning ones role or position in particular situation. However often these are situations one can either not avoid, or p...

The Scam: Ah, law of attraction and other similar self help scams. So common now on the internet and the self help section of any book store. They have tonnes of money by playing on people's emotions. Tell people its easy and they will buy it! This is the same trick used by fitness product promoters and TV commercials and it has worked well for decades. As soon as you find out that this is not the 'answer to everything', you start seeking the next 'quick or easy fix''. Its a dirty trick and plays on our search for easy answers, the magic pills, and the easy answers. They say losing weight is as easy as a few minutes on this machine, or getting rich is as easy as visualizing, and before you know it, you have giving out your cash and realized soon enough that this is not the answer you were looking for. So what gives? is this all fake? is law of attraction or the self help motivational books nothing but a waster of time? Yes and No: There is a lot o...

Mujeeb was a pottery student in the ancient city of Multan back in ancient times, in one of the earliest known settlements in the world. Growing up in one the great pottery making towns of antiquity, Mujeed had always been fascinated by the crafts. The colours, the intricate designs and the tradition of pottery, had all put a huge impression on him since he was a kid. He was taken under apprenticeship by his Uncle, Ustad Mali, one of the most renowned pottery craftsman of the age, at the very young age of 12. Slowly but surely Mujeeb perfected his skills. He started from learning about the material, ie the earth, water, hay and slowly went up to craft a potting and later on even painting. By the time Mujeeb was 20 years old, he was one of the brightest pottery apprentices in Ustad Malis shop. Mujeeb showed great promise and it was understood that he would grow up to be a master himself. However, Mujeeb wanted more. Mujeeb did not want to be just another pottery craftsman, he wanted...

All day, everyday, we face negative feelings coming from work, family, friends, chores and what not. We go around hoping from one problem to the other, getting through one deadline to the next. As strong as we may be, no one is totally immune to work, stress and anxiety. Either its too much work, or too little work, or things not working out, whatever the case there is always something out there to turn our mood sour. There is no way around the daily grind, we cannot run away from it and in fact, we all may even need it. However there surely are ways one can manage their mood. Friend/Family First Aid Reminder: All mental health and many alternative medicine techniques, including meditation, are usually about convincing yourself of a new belief. Some use a therapist, some use meditation apps, some use affirmations, however a great technique would be for friends/family to send reminders to each other. These are not generic social media feel good messages that we  send to all...

I believe in the power of convincing yourself that you can do anything. This alone is the most fundamental belief, the most powerful idea, anyone can have for themselves. It is not about succeeding, as success has luck/chance as a component, but the fact that you will try your very best. No where can this rule be applied more than in Public Speaking. Background One of the first times I was to give a presentation I went on to youtube and watched a business guru speak. He was so active on stage, so smooth and so confident. His attitude showed that he was 'damn sure' that everything he said was true. His confidence was idiotically high and inspiring. Of course, his advice was highly regarded and was truly valuable, but he also knew how to 'sell' that advice. It was brilliant. I watched his videos again and again for a week, practicing my presentation on his behaviour. I emulated him totally. When it came to giving the presentation I was very nervous. Once the present...

Living in the moment All of the new age movement seems to be about living in the moment. Be it mindfulness, meditation, deep breathing, everyone tells us the benefits of experiencing the full moment and living in the now. By having our attention directed to what we are doing at the moment, we can fully experience and react to what is happening now. With focus, we are able to deal with threats and opportunities more effectively, be more productive and enjoy ourselves fuller. By accepting a negative feeling, a failure, a mistake, we can move on quicker. Overall living in the moment makes us healthy. Sure. However..... there are surely times when distraction can help. Moments of Distraction Hypnotherapists understand the power of distraction very well. It is not the fact that we live in the moment that gives us mastery over our sense, it is the ability to direct our attention when and where we need it most. Following are examples of situations where distractions help us out. ...

I started this blog to convey my thoughts on getting through the struggle of everyday life, the challenges, opportunities and the threats that it throws at us. The life becomes simple, yet not easy, when one understands a basic truth ie we must live life, the way it is, good or bad, and deal with it. We can always pursue a better life, more money and try to improve our current conditions, but we can simply not say that 'we do not want life'. We simply cannot 'deny that we have a problem', we simply cannot look the other way when we are afraid to make a leap. Life is life, and things happen and we have to learn to be able to deal with the good, the bad and everything in between. As we go on this journey together, I will document my thoughts on how to go through the emotional, psychical, psychological and spiritual issues that everyone faces. I do not follow a self help program or a new age thought philosophy that I want others to believe in. I also do not believe ...