Convincing Ourselves

Introduction Influencing the general public is a hotly debated topic in the policy. In any form of government reforms and agendas have to be 'sold' to the public. The government has traditionally been done through information dissemination through the media and done so quite effectively. An example can be of course selling wars or military interventions to the public. When the intent, however, is misinformation on a large scale, it becomes 'propaganda'. Despite its negative connotations, it is surely been present in democracies, as much as in dictatorships. A few years ago we have seen a move towards 'Nudging' individuals also called the Nudge Theory. This was popularized by Book by Cass Sunstein and Richard Thaler in their book ' Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness '. An example of this could be the wording on a referendum to discourage a certain outcome or perhaps limiting choices for the consumers on the type o...

Avoiding pain is a great motivator in human beings. Neurologically, in fact, it is a bigger motivator than seeking pleasure. This is more so during childhood phase but is also prevalent throughout life As children we tend to develop habits, solely to survive or to avoid the ‘threat’ of being killed. Human beings are tribal by nature and we survive by being in tribes. A child will copy his peers, to try to fit in. They may dress up as their peers or have the same interests. This is not at all bad as it helps us develop necessary social and life skills. However, a child that has been bullied by kids or abused at home, may want to ‘avoid’ groups as that is where their survival is. They may believe they are safer away from groups, which they view as a threat. A ridiculed child feels useless and unwanted around people and anyone in any tribe that is unwanted is bound to die alone (at least metaphorically these days).  A child who has parents that shower love and attention base...

There still exists a lot of trauma and stigma surrounding mental health, especially in developing countries. People are not only unaware of what mental health is, once they are, but they also shy away from going to a professional with the belief that they themselves or their loved ones might think that they are 'handicapped' or 'not normal'. However, it is important to recognize that ignoring a problem doesn't make it go away. Mental Health issues take a toll on families, organizations and society at large. It is important to realize that mental health issues are common and prevalent. They come in all shapes and sizes and lay on a continuum from something as small as anxiety to something as deadly as anorexia. Ignoring mental health issues can have devastating effects. One example of how mental disorders can impact physical health is anorexia and bulimia, deemed one of the most deadly psychological disorders out there. Having an anorexic child often leaves...

Whenever we go to therapists or doctors, as to assume we are walking into someones' office who, unlike us mere mortals, knows better and behaves better. It seems like we are the ones who need a flu shot or a prescription for sleep, but the doctors, the therapists, the coaches, always seem to have it together. Is that even possible? A 2008 study "Doctors as patients: a systematic review of doctors' health access and the barriers they experience" by Kay et al , describes how there is little research on the area, but acknowledged that they have as much access to healthcare, especially mental health care, as the general population. There truly exists this 'veneer' that our dentist, our doctors, our upper management, our coaches, anyone we deem more knowledgable, skilled or authority, does not have the problem that we suffer from. The reality I believe is different. Psychologists need help too, and they need it on an ongoing basis, to help solve their o...

The Instagram fueled modern times of ours has lead to so many fad diets that it's hard to keep count. From Atkins and Keto to Vegan and even raw food, there is so much misleading information out there and people are so hungry for a quick fix, as well as for validation and acceptance, that most have tried at least one of these. The reality, however, is not that different from the early days of the exercise machine fad. Since the 80s late-night commercials have promised us the holy grail of fitness by selling us some cheap plastic exercise machine. Those days are well behind us as most have realized that the answer to fitness has been all around us. The bottom line was that there is no easy or painless way to health and everyone's path truly differs. The same goes for food. There truly is no holy grail where one can follow a diet and achieve glowing skin, muscular strength, excellent mood, and longevity. Even reading this sentence makes it obvious how diets have sold t...

Milton Erikson is considered one of the grandfathers in psychology circles and there is a good reason for that. Erikson essentially combined talk therapy and hypnotherapy in a way that made it clear how therapy itself was more of an art than a science. Milton’s biggest contribution was perhaps his open definition of what can be called hypnosis and how therapy could be done. Apparently not limited by definition, and protocol, many of Erikson’s cases seem improvised. It seems as if he was trying to figure out what worked and how and at the same time employing methods far removed from what could today be considered hypnotherapy. The best example is when asked what he does when clients cannot go into a trance, and his reply was that he ‘bores’ them into one. Erikson was controversial and still remains to this day. His methods have been extended and studied to create ‘Eriksonian’ methodology that apparently many go on to study. Erikson himself probably found the confines of what cam...

Many people go around life aimlessly. Comparing themselves to others, not knowing what the next day, month or year will bring for them. There is a sense of being unfulfilled or unhappy, often resulting in depression in the most extreme form. For most people, the reason is simple. They simply have no goals No goals for their life, no goals for their health, no goals for their profession. Without a set goal and path, we simply lack a direction and a purpose. This not only results in confusion but also anxiety and depression. One of the reasons ‘life coaching’ is so big now is because a lot of the uncertainty and anxiety that people face in everyday life has to do with not unfulfilled goals, but simply not even knowing what they really want. Having goals differentiates purposeful living from living aimlessly. It is perhaps the easiest and quickest key to overcoming paralysis, procrastination, and unhappiness and moving towards success that is personally gratifying. The quest...

The Scam: Ah, law of attraction and other similar self help scams. So common now on the internet and the self help section of any book store. They have tonnes of money by playing on people's emotions. Tell people its easy and they will buy it! This is the same trick used by fitness product promoters and TV commercials and it has worked well for decades. As soon as you find out that this is not the 'answer to everything', you start seeking the next 'quick or easy fix''. Its a dirty trick and plays on our search for easy answers, the magic pills, and the easy answers. They say losing weight is as easy as a few minutes on this machine, or getting rich is as easy as visualizing, and before you know it, you have giving out your cash and realized soon enough that this is not the answer you were looking for. So what gives? is this all fake? is law of attraction or the self help motivational books nothing but a waster of time? Yes and No: There is a lot o...

All day, everyday, we face negative feelings coming from work, family, friends, chores and what not. We go around hoping from one problem to the other, getting through one deadline to the next. As strong as we may be, no one is totally immune to work, stress and anxiety. Either its too much work, or too little work, or things not working out, whatever the case there is always something out there to turn our mood sour. There is no way around the daily grind, we cannot run away from it and in fact, we all may even need it. However there surely are ways one can manage their mood. Friend/Family First Aid Reminder: All mental health and many alternative medicine techniques, including meditation, are usually about convincing yourself of a new belief. Some use a therapist, some use meditation apps, some use affirmations, however a great technique would be for friends/family to send reminders to each other. These are not generic social media feel good messages that we  send to all...

I believe in the power of convincing yourself that you can do anything. This alone is the most fundamental belief, the most powerful idea, anyone can have for themselves. It is not about succeeding, as success has luck/chance as a component, but the fact that you will try your very best. No where can this rule be applied more than in Public Speaking. Background One of the first times I was to give a presentation I went on to youtube and watched a business guru speak. He was so active on stage, so smooth and so confident. His attitude showed that he was 'damn sure' that everything he said was true. His confidence was idiotically high and inspiring. Of course, his advice was highly regarded and was truly valuable, but he also knew how to 'sell' that advice. It was brilliant. I watched his videos again and again for a week, practicing my presentation on his behaviour. I emulated him totally. When it came to giving the presentation I was very nervous. Once the present...

Living in the moment All of the new age movement seems to be about living in the moment. Be it mindfulness, meditation, deep breathing, everyone tells us the benefits of experiencing the full moment and living in the now. By having our attention directed to what we are doing at the moment, we can fully experience and react to what is happening now. With focus, we are able to deal with threats and opportunities more effectively, be more productive and enjoy ourselves fuller. By accepting a negative feeling, a failure, a mistake, we can move on quicker. Overall living in the moment makes us healthy. Sure. However..... there are surely times when distraction can help. Moments of Distraction Hypnotherapists understand the power of distraction very well. It is not the fact that we live in the moment that gives us mastery over our sense, it is the ability to direct our attention when and where we need it most. Following are examples of situations where distractions help us out. ...

Confused Confused, indecisive, procrastinate? Sometimes we just cant make sense of things and because we cant make sense of things we don't take action. Of course, nothing is more important than action but when life overwhelms us with choices, information, chores, sometimes it becomes difficult to look past the immediate and take a birds eye view of the grand perspective. There are many such instances where we can simply not think right, ranging from small everyday things, starnge annoyances, all the way to big life decisions eg 1-Buying a new smart phone? --we can be confused about specs, pricing, plans etc 2-Eating out, where to go?-- what to eat, why to go there? 3-Do my classmates hate me? --why do they laugh at me? why do I have so few friends? 3-Which university to go to? --what will it cost, what will be the return, how far will it be from home? etc etc etc Once we convince ourselves that there is a path forward, we can break through all the clutter and cle...