How to change another person?

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Wish they were different

Don't we just wish we could change some of the people around us. We wish for all sorts of things to happen. We wish our kid starts acting like a grown up, or our teacher treats us with a bit less harshness, or that neighbor we thought of saying hello to but looks so mean. Whatever the case, be it your friends, your boss or family, we would certainly like to change one thing or the other. However there is one, smart tool to get the change you want in the people around you. Start treating them as if they were already as you want!

Another path to change

You see, you do not have to wish for someone to change, you can actually make it happen. Now this does not mean that I am claiming this tool to be the 'end all be all' method of getting the girl of your dreams or tackling your problem teenage, however I think its a clever technique to have in your tool kit or skill set to use when required.

You can start treating a subordinate as if they can handle responsibility. Like this you can slowly, slowly, supervise them and delegate your responsibilities until you have trained him.

You can treat your disgruntled mother in law with kindness, and slowly, slowly she will realize the goodness in you as well.

You can treat a homeless person as if they have a job, by giving them small chores for you, and they will eventually come out of poverty and have the will to start working again.

It is also possible that this technique does very little for you, however it is also possible that it might help you understand another side of yourself. A side that takes responsibility of what is going on rather than simply feel victimized. It may also help one see our own side that can change and be flexible in varying situations, as we are certainly more adaptive than we usually chose to believe.

Simple ideas can go a long way. Treating someone as if they were how you want them to be, helps you change someone else for the better and create a strong, genuine relationship while doing it.


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